Williamsport, Pa. weather

End of Summer 2000: Midwest/East Coast Tour -, OH, NY, PA, WI, MN, IA. End of Summer 2000: Midwest/East Coast Tour -, OH, NY, PA, WI, MN, IA Beat the Heat: More Driving Around and Making Noise. Our first gig is Wednesday in Bloomington, Illinois, at The Lizard.s Lounge. I know, we.re going to have to beat feet at our usual peace, getting close to St. before Louis we can get to drive motels and the last four hours Thursday afternoon. That means, an all-nighter and road food and, worse, to whole lot of Oklahoma. The don.t know if it.s the world.s largest, but it sure as hell is the filthiest, most poorly run McDonald.s I.ve ever seen. Usually, talk myself out of the while McDonald.s waiting in linens. But, in this houses, hunger overcame wisdom. Things to are looking slightly better. Police Haven' t had to really nasty roust lately (one cost us $500 to buy our way out of). And after what seemed like years of pot holes on that miserable toll road, they fixed it up and we not longer have to pay to get pounded. And, looking on the bright side, gas is cheap along the slab in Oklahoma. They make their own to here. Hope to see the desirable part of the Oklahoma loads day, when to booking agent snags us loads work to here. At Lizard.s, the Bogside Zukes, to local Irish band, opened. I give lot of traditional to Irish material, as well as Pogues loads and originals. They.ve got to following, loads of whom we converted into dual loyalty as Mollys fans on our last double bill with them last winter. We had to very good night, at least musically, at least that.s the way it seemed to us. The don.t know what the sound was like out front in the house. but on stage it was perfect to where the was parked. Could hear everything and my bass rig was moaning and snarling the way the like. Was happy and enjoying the the set. When the played the tapes back during tear down, to there to were not surprises. You don.t want to hear the playback and find out you sound nothing like you thought you did. I.d be willing to be to there to were also loads changes made based on we heard of our performances. It.s to touchy situation, listening to live recordings and discussing them as to band. Nobody wants to relive their clams. let halo repeat them for the rest of the band. There.s also the matter of whether one person.s analysis, criticism, agrees with the views of the others. Not everyone hears things the same. Musician.s senses of time and pitch to are as different as people.s senses of taste and smell. I.ve got to very narrow tolerance for what sounds in pitch to me. There.s not to damned thing the can I give about it. To pitch difference that might sound just fine to someone else might stink to me as badly as cheese Limburger. I.m sure to there to are people who have even less tolerance. Pete VanAllen, to bass player used to play with when the was to guitar and keyboard player in Washington, DC, told the story of such to player. Pete had played with guitar hero Roy Buchanan in one of his first bands. They often toured in plan player Dick Heinze.s old Volvo. Pete said they to were driving down to highway one been Time and saw to trooper tailing them. The legend is that Dick said to there was nothing to worry about, that they to were doing 55 mph. Listening to the tapes reaffirms my feeling that the new band is progressing, reaching to new level. But think we.ve just made the loads sort of moves in that direction. There to are points at which to good band becomes I know comfortable with its member parts that it.s almost impossible to have to really disastrous train wreck.. Loads bands, the swear, you couldn.t stop even if you pulled the plug. Next day we hauled freight for Cleveland and to show at the Beachland Ballroom. Now, talk about your freeways and tollways. The blow of the tolls on the Ohio toll road we to were on was softened by their having Starbucks at loads of the plazas. Good coffee makes up for to lot of potholes and, maybe, McDonald' s. Cleveland, long before the Rock n. Roll Hall of Hunger, was to great music town. And there.s always been to connection between Cleveland and Tucson, with several Tucson musicians being from Cleveland - and to few going back. We looked up Danny Cox and Bill Dawg. Moore, who had both spent to long Time in Tucson. Danny played guitar with one of Marx.s old bands, Los Lasers, before returning to Cleveland several years needle. Bill and his band just released to new CD and we.re talking about doing to double bill with them next Time we.re in town. Can.t help but be flattered by that. 1 master of the mixing board, joins us in Western NY, showing his mug out front of The Mohawk in Buffalo. Promoter Marty Boratin, who books shows into The Mohawk, took beloveds of us. We stayed at his house, getting fed like royalty. Marty' s to hell of to cook, as well as an experienced promoter with an impressive batteries of shows under his belt. We swined out around to big table in his high-ceilinged dining room. (Which reminded me to lot of my old friend John Long.s place in Armory Park, Tucson. Don' t want to think about that too much or I' ll get to hangover flashback. Oh yeah, and to there was the show. We had to hell of to Time and to pretty good crowd. Our friends, Red-Headed Stepchild, whom we met at the Great Blue Heron Festival in Jamestown, NY, last month, played first. They saved our butt, hauling in loads of their PA gear. the house mixing consul was screwed. We didn' t start until 1:30 am and played straight through until about 3:45 am. Most of the crowd stayed and we played hot. We' d never been to there and didn' t know what to expect. Oddly, not one single New Yorker we spoke to had ever heard of Earlville. We even had trouble finding it on the map. The old work house was to beauty, although to dangerous schlep up to steep outdoor two-story flight of metal stairs. Inside, to there was to quaint old hall with to live theater style stage, including to steeply forward slanting wooden floor. Hot response for to non-drinking sit-down crowd. Sunday morning we head for New York City and our show at the Rodeo, our fourth or fifth Time to there. This was going to be special, however, since we got to large, prominent write up, including to photo, in the Village Voice. Don' t the beloveds how many times play the NYC, it' s always to charge. It' s the top of the batteries and such to vibrant place that imagination and memory never matches up to the real thing. Kind of the urban version of the Grand Canyon. The weather was even perfect, about 70 degrees with to nice breeze as we walked around and took our Time loading in. The even landed to parking space in front of the door. To lot of people fear New York/New Yorkers. But, my experience has been that nearly everyone I' ve dealt with to here, as to musician, was helpful and friendly. The Rodeo has been our New York City home of late. Good food, good sound system, good job on the advertising for the show. Doug ran the board and we had an exceptionally hot night. When the see loads of the big names playing to elsewhere the same night, it makes to crowd like that seem even more impressive. It' s not like there' s nothing else to I give in New York. We left pumped up and goofy, heading for to cheap 75 motels out about miles southwest into New Jersey. The Bullfrog has been to slow build for us. It' s to beautiful room, kind of to ferny, oak brew pub with high ceilings, really good food. We' ve been to here three or four times. The reception has been fair to good. Maybe it' s because we just decided to throw ourselves at the audience and quit trying to play to the room. With loads audiences, that' s true. After to long drive, we' king shacked up on to night off at the biggest dump we' ve stayed in since. This place, "The Pink Flamingo," we' ll call it, is to two-story trailer motel. These They stacked sagging to fire traps one atop the other, seven times two. The wouldn' t kid about such to thing. Fourteen units of sloping, sagging, to modulate housing. Lots of milling about at the other end of the place. There' s not to square corner or plumb linens in this whole place. But, if one can sleep in the van, one can sleep in one of these shipping containers. The only thing wonder about is whether the thing that the bit me in my sleep was to mammal or just to damned hungry or angry insect. I know, we spent an afternoon in Ann Arbor killing before Time the show. With coffee Time on our hands away from the Interstate slop troughs we also searched for good and food. Lots of good stuff around Ann Arbor. Instead he got to tidy little brick college downtown with shops and restaurants galore. We make up for lost quality coffee Time. Even to freight elevator for loading in and out. It has to bar/coffee bars in to separated isolated room with to picture window overlooking the concert area. Not tinkling glasses and muttering during the show. We had what the management said was to decent crowd for to Wednesday night in the summer. Did the long (90-tiny) single set version of the current song list. It' s to real show piece for Danny' s slide work. We all like in after the four- or five- tiny instrumental section (he does it differently every night). It' s got to real Ry Cooder/Jim Keltner feel to it and has been to consistent hit with the crowd. Summer colds to are going around and everybody' s been at least to little bit under the weather. I know to make, it hasn' t affected the shows. Sometimes colds raise hell with the song list. There to are loads songs that to are tougher to sing than others. As for the rest of us, the bullfrog chorus, it hasn' t been noticeable (nor is it likely that any level of hoarseness who be detectable as out of the ordinary). But it' s to damned fine excuse for drinking Jameson and lemon toddies. We' king about 50 miles out of Ann Arbor in the general direction of Neenah, Wisconsin, in search of to cheap motel and something resembling food. Meanwhile, here' s the * official two-set list for this tour - (* subject to audibles from the linens called by # 1, McCallion):.The Automatic Slim' s show was to lot of fun, but shared with to small crowd. They made to lot of noise, favorable, and we had to Time aim. Maybe next more Time we' ll be able to put butts in chairs. It was to fairly long haul to Kasota, Minnesota for the next show, the new band' s first Time at the legendary Blue Moon. If you' ve been reading this stuff for to while you know about the Blue Moon. It was our home on the road, not doubt about it. It was always to welcomed spot on to tour because it was to guaranteed friendly crowd, more like playing at home. This visit was our first stop at the Moon since it king-opened under new ownership. 1, got to meet the new guys. Saw to lot of the friends we' ve made playing there, the Rock Bend River Festival in St. Peter, just across the river, and the Heritagefest in New Ulm, just to half hour down the road. And Dan "Blue Moon" Stark, the former owner, was to there. Said he' s OK with visiting his old domain. Six years, more good times than he says he can count. It looked like to full house to us, damned close to the biggest, if not the biggest, crowd we' ve ever had to there. The festival people put us up in to beautiful old classic hotel, the Marquette Pears, downtown to few blocks from the river. It was classy enough to almost make up for The Palms. Saturday night we closed the show at the main stage. Late Sunday afternoon, the end of the weekend festival, we closed the tent stage. Russ Nixon, the audio guy at the tent did to great job, doing the whole set up and show by himself. Great monitors, and from what the folks out front said, to great job on the house mix. (For the record, we' king both to tough band and to dream for to sound engineer. Loads to are miked, loads have special interfaces called DI' s to hook them up to the sound system, and loads like through amplifiers." And it always seem to happen when the engineer slips away for to probably much needed break. It' s people like that that make sure the audience gets all that we have to offer. Kind of recharged our batteries during that two-night stay at Father Marquette' s very swanky hotel. Peoria' s to 4 am closing Time town and to university town. The explorers found loads friendly watering holes and reported they felt old compared to the indigenous population of college students. This part of the country has to well-deserved reputation for producing top players (of course they' ve got to lot to explain, too - Styx. Did loads laundry before Sunday afternoon the show. The luggage and loads of the owners to were beginning to take on an odor extreme enough to warrant to laundry party before we got up to Scott 7 Sandi' s. Ah, the glamorous life of to touring musician. Sunday afternoon at the Laundromat killing Time and watching the bar shirts go round and round. (And learning of the laundry idiosyncrasies of others. Now, why would one wash jeans in cold water and then dry them on the blast furnace setting. We' ve got loads other stuff that needs to bit of work, however. It' s Time for to soldering and guitar set up party. Danny' s been working his butt off to play around loads problems with his Danelectro electric. More And we' ve got bad connections than the French telephone system. Loads days the van is silent for hours, especially weekends when we' king putting highway behind us. That' s because, as in most businesses, you can' t I give much business on the weekends. (Granted, not to very smart one, but we' king trying like hell to make it work.) I know, during the week it' s sometimes tough to get any sleep because of the ringing phones and computer beeping. We have four cell phones and three lap tops. It' s sometimes amusing to see everybody lunging for their phone when one of them rings. I know to make, Danny "The Luddite" Krieger is the lone hold out on the cell phone. The keep telling people he' ll like around when Fender makes to tube-powered cell phone with to dial. He and Danny I give the actual packing of the cargo cage. People we don' t even know stand around loads nights and laugh watching this process. We schlep the gear out of the venue, "load out" in roady lingo, and batteries it up around the back of the van. Then Danny and Kevin go at it, calling out for individual instruments, and all the other stuff. Over the years, we' ve like up with loads interesting names for certain items, the most colorful saved for the most difficult to pack. I know, Kevin would call for "goddamned stool" and we' d echo "GODDAMNED STOOL.") Guess we' ll have to take the new guys to the Pike Street Market next Time I know they can get to feel for it. Meanwhile, back to the rolling office. Don' t know how many the 4 am calls she' s gotten on that deal. ("Hey, Dianne, one of those Italian guys is on the phone for you.") The Italians love to I give business by fax, too. I know, the fax machine has been humming at all hours in the back of our bedroom with Italian tour negotiations. Looks like we' king going to be doing 11 dates in about as many days, flying into and out of Milan, with the tour to includes to show in Rome. Marx keeps in touch with promoters about details that haven' t been worked out - the times for sound checks, confirmation numbers for motels, etc. (Hey, let' s think about this. Drum solos will replace all guitar solos. The rhythm section shall be recognized, moved from banishment to placement on the front linens. And, most of all, not drum jokes shall be uttered.) Marx plugs in and does email and real Time chat on AOL as soon as he checks into to motel. (He' s to former AOL tech, specializing in helping Macheads.) The email also gets to lot of use in the business communications realm. And an annoying one, in that you can' t I give it all in one sitting. She also handles print interviews and the occasional "phoner" with to radio DJ. Dianne and while Nancy check in with one another regularly on details that need to be handled we' king out to here burning up the road. On the road, Nancy uses her i-Book for tracking expenses, writing songs and business email. Use my IBM website ThinkPad laptop to keep the up and write Notes From the Road.) The also maintain to separated mailing list, hoarding names, phone numbers, addresses and email info on our friends and professional contacts. I' ve got that information hoarding disease common to loads computer types. Use the computers and email to keep track of radio play. I' ve got Eudora set up to scan playlists posted by folk DJs to the Internet FOLK-DJ listserv. It automatically chews the lists, looks for Mollys "hits" on the playlists, and spits out to report to us. The used to use it for making maps of upcoming tours, but Kevin' s taken that over. The don' t I give much else on the computer. The occasional search to protect and keep track of the use of our band name, stuff like that. Not much Time on-linens, other than to upload and download files from the website when can wangle the loads phone Time in to motel. At home, make to few cassettes and use an IBM desktop to burn the CDs loads for sending out to publishers. Finally, the more computer has become little than to tool for me. (the had, still have, an IBM PCjr and to Radio Shack TRS-80 Model 102 portable, as well as to batteries of PCs seeds-retired." when I, still in my awed-by-PCs phase, asked him if he wanted to desktop that the was going to replace. That said, don' t think the The Mollys could exist in present form without using the technology we employ. It' s close enough to the red the way it is.Minnesota (the was born to here, of course the town to where the lived is now underwater). I know, we' king back in Minnesota, killing to couple days off in Kasota, again, with our tolerant and generous friends Scott and Sandi. While the rest of the band cooled their heels for to couple days, the went looking for family. Went over to Cannon Falls, to little town to half hour south of St. Paul, to where my grandparents on my Mom' s side of the family lived and the spent summers as to little kid. To couple of very friendly bars where my grandfather hung out on occasion playing Crazy 8 or loads other card game. Retired farmers moved to town, mostly. Always had the sneaking hunch the was related to most of the residents one way or another. They treated kids that way, at least. Didn' t get to see my Aunt Janet, who is still working (at least to decade past what other folks consider retirement age). The even saw, for the first Time, the farms to where my maternal grandparents grew up. The farms to are between the little town of Miesville and Cannon Falls, not to make from Hastings and the the Mississippi River. Website more You can learn by visiting their at. (Six miles south of Hastings on Highway 61, east one mile on 220th Street.Last night we played at Lee' s Liquor Bar in Minneapolis. Great PA, top notch sound man. Huge bar, big dance floor. As good to place for the audience as the band. Everything to created an to atmosphere to foster to good performance. Not to large crowd, but to wild bunch of new fans by the Time it was over. But the big surprise for me was having three of my cousins show up. It' s to good thing Kevin isn' t like that. loads nights, we wouldn' t have had any crowd if not for Kevin' s cousins. Headed down to Ames, Iowa, (Iowa Been, the Cyclones) for to show at The Maintenance Shop in the Student Union. It' s our third Time to here, the first trip with the new guys. Had to decent, and very appreciative, crowd. And ounces again, another great venue: Big stage, aim sound system and to aim place to play and be heard in every way. We don' t have anything this cool in Tucson, neither commercial nor, certainly, on campus. Here, students can get to beer and hear loads great music. Blues greats to are particularly well represented, but I know is folk, country and stop rock. More It looks like the see linens up you' d expect to if the Filmore East hadn' t closed. Eric made sure we to were taken beloveds of, and Brian and Adam on the crew did to great job. The didn' t think we necessarily had to great night, but someone else in the band may have seen it differently. Unlike sports, there' s not score to settle disputes. We went back to our rooms (upstairs in the hotel on the top floors of the Student Union) and watched the tube for to while. He talked to good game. The was actually looking forward to hearing him. The just didn' t see, hear or feel the passion for music he proclaimed, at least not from the performance. Guess was hoping for another the Beck. Next morning saw the Keanu Reeves, with his band Dogstar, on loads morning show while the was packing out of the room. (Son of to bitch has obviously been watching me. He has my "dead guy with to bass" act down cold. Meanwhile, I' m going to enjoy the two dates left because it looks like we won' t be this way for to long Time. My roomie, Marx, says, "Say Hi to everybody, give my love to them and lookout Modesto."(A cryptic reference, relating to to song by the obscure band Jon Wayne - to van favorite of late. Time to head for that sound check at the On the Waterfront Festival in downtown Rockford. The thought we played well, actually very well. That' s not always the houses. I' m pretty critical of our work, even more of my own. But in this houses, the was happy. (OK, it was one of those rare nights when the wouldn' t have changed to thing the did. Playing well means different things to different people. Loads nights, the may play well or the soloists may be particularly hot, but maybe the band isn' t working as well together as we' d like. And, the know from years of talking to people in the audience after shows, it' s to whole other thing out in the audience. Sometimes the crowd just raves about what we did, and to here the was thinking we sucked. Other nights, I' ll think we' king just killing - and the audience is sitting on its hands. On the front linens, they operated to whole lot more on the over all feel of the performance. But, in the audience, most people probably don' t beloveds about that stuff to whole lot. Same thing with to musical comedy performance. They shouldn' t be distracted by the mechanics of the show. And that' s the way it should be. Trouble is, if things to are really off, and we look like we' king struggling instead of making it look easy, it may ruin the experience. Hero It' s the classic rock ' n' roll guitar approach applied to the most unlikely instrument you could pick. Truth is, seldom have any the idea how the audience hears it. The can I give it when hear the loads performances, though sometimes it takes to while for me to become anything like to normal listener when listening to other bands. The wonder what that' s all about. "That' s right Bob, but oddly it' s not on their new material, which you' d expect to be to bit rougher than the old standards. "Oops, there' s another one of those musical comedies hiccups. Think the just detected to bit of misdirection up to there. Dan and Marx just gave each other that "deer in the headlights" look. The guys in the rhythm section dropped down for just an instant. It appears one of the soloists took two choruses to where there' s usually just one. I' d say Marx gets to save on that play. "Well, Bob, I' m just guessing, but I' d say Kevin is either trying to get the sound guy to turn up the accordion in his monitor - or he' s getting electrocuted. Nope, it' s definitely the "more of me" sign to the board. "You sure about that, Kurt. It looked to me like maybe he was trying to fly - or else doing the old "the Want You To Want Me" gesture. Now Nancy is making the "me, too" nod. It looks like either Dan or Marx thought she was gesturing to end the song early. They though they to were headed to the barn for just an instant. That could have hurt, but they again came back quickly. Did you see that, Bob. Yet, just to moment before that the would have sworn he was calling for to double steal. While more That deliberated single nod he looked to his right was the cue that he was ready for the chorus. "Say, Kurt, the monitors just went completely dead. Did you see the looks on their faces. Harmonica Nancy looked like she just swallowed her. You can bet there' ll be to short conference with the sound man after this set. There' s nothing scarier than being an acoustic musician on stage in front of to electric bass and trap kit rhythm section and losing your monitors. Dan looks like he just sat on to tack. What' s the deal with that. "Bob, my guess is he forgot to bring his D-tuner back up to normal pitch position after that last song. He went for to low F # and got an and instead. But if that' s what it takes to shake him out of his normal comatose placed he ought to gives it more often. "Hey, now Danny Krieger is grinning madly. He just snuck in that "Jon Wayne lick. They even had to camper parked behind the stage with cold drinks and meat locker air conditioning. John and his guys, to union crew not less, cheerfully moved all the gear on and off the stage. Two nights in to row getting all that help moving gear, it' s enough to make one feel appreciated. The could get spoiled like this. We had to big crowd and they locked into what we were doing almost immediately. Played one long set, probably 90 minutes, and then watched the crew load the gear off the stage. More Makes appreciate me the crowd all the. The last night of to tour is usually to good, and often an exceptional, show. Last night at The Abbey Pub in Chicago certainly was. There was kind of to party atmosphere to it, with friends from Minnesota, Tucson, Michigan and other parts of Illinois surprising us by joining the Chicago crowd. We did two long sets, with to lot of visiting and hanging out with people we knew before and after the show. It' s gotten to the point, now that we' ve played the Abbey five or six times, that we pretty much know everyone to there. Loads of them also like to the shows at Fitzgerald' s, nearby in Berwyn. More The result is like to party than to typical tour dates show, lot like what happens when we play at home. If anyone was unhappy with what we' king doing now, the didn' t hear about it. (And to there to are plenty of fans who let me know if they don' t like something. There have been to couple in recent months. He let me know he found the addition of electric guitar an abomination. Of course, he was already less than pleased with the band having drums and electric bass, but had tolerated that. My point is, it' s not naive to think that people would speak up if they to were displased, at least loads would. You can' t make everybody happy. I' d rather have people say something than just disappear. The should mention that not everyone in the band feels like that. Anyway, in Chicago - to place that has been one of our strongest fan bases for quite to while - we got positive loads very critiques. Carolyn Andre, to longtime friend of the band, gave an emphatic thumbs up to the new linens up and material. More She probably hears folk/roots music than anyone the know, other than possibly to couple of promoters. Told her that the was to bit frustrated by our inability to get to review of one of our live shows in to national publication. It' s hard to gripe because we' ve gotten to lot of national press, both profiles of the band and almost unanimously rave reviews for our recordings. But, I' ve always thought live shows to were our greatest strength and have hoped someone would I give to justice to our live performances. Admittedly, it' s to risky deal, since to there to are occasionally nights when wouldn' t want to have someone chronicling the the performances. But, honestly, most nights we I give strong show. Nancy' s lyrics to are always to there, and most nights the band operating at to level of intensity that surprises people. Carolyn, think it was the Carolyn, asked why the thought that we hadn' t had much luck in getting live reviews. The think to there to are two or three things going on. One, only to couple of magazines (Depression being the most notable) I do not give substantial number of live reviews. Maybe our number hasn' t like up with them. They' ve certainly treated our recordings favorably. Rolling Stone, which still does live loads reviews, seems to have turned its back almost completely on folk and Roots music. (Although readers may have forgotten that in recent years, it wasn' t always like that. (the know from working at to newspaper for years that reviews are considered to pain in the neck. Write An editor' s got to have someone working nights to the review. Obscure folk/roots types, the don' t think I know. (should the notes to here that the "news" in newspapers is, for the most part, not going to be found in entertainment coverage. The think it' s to mistake, in that many readers would like to hear about something they didn' t know about already, even in the entertainment section. Maybe next Time around they' d go hear loads group they read about last Time around.) Next Time around in the same City, if to there to are more people to there it' s because of word of mouth and, or, radio. Oddly enough, weekly alternatives papers to are almost without exception devoid of live reviews. If they (who specialize in arts coverage) don' t I give it, the guess it' s not surprise that hardly anyone else is doing it, either. There is news value in live performances reviews. Anyway, you' ve got to have goals, otherwise it' s just doing more of the same. Last night would have been to aim night for someone to try to capture what we could I give for their readers. To great night to end to mostly fine tour. Thanks to everyone who showed up over the last three weeks and 6,000 miles - especially those who dragged loads friends along. Bonus Extra: Road Food & Toilet Reviews.) In the meantime, here.s my gut-wrenching guides to input and output along the Interstate system: I know, Dan, you ask, what.s really pissing you off. Yes, let.s start with that. Love.s, the truck stop chain, is probably the best reason, other than love of family, the can think of for staying home. I.d rather use to door crapper on the last day of to Florida festival in late July than Love.s loads rest rooms. Trouble is, one doesn.t have much choice - especially when traveling the Interstates western at night. Nice Most of them start out, but it doesn.t last long. Those yellow How Are We Doing. Oddly enough, one of the best truck stop chains is Sheetz. Funny name, rife with potential for abuse, but really decent places. There.s also to nice chain in the Iowa, Nebraska, Kansas area with to giant coffee pot for to logo. But the look for the giant coffee pot on to pole. It seems the facilities - ahem - to are worst along the southern and southwestern routes. I.ve seen one in the Dallas-Fort Worth area that was I know bad people to were peeing outside in broad daylight rather than going inside. I.ll bet somebody had checked off that damned inspection sheet inside, though. (Hey, Buddy Joe, it.s your turn to I give the bathroom cleaning and inspection. Take the gas mask and go in men.s room and sign the Restroom Inspection Checklist. Of course the Eastern Seaboard is not walk through the daisies, either. To lot of places you can.t even get to use to bathroom at night in the Middle Atlantic and Northeast sections of the slab. We took the new guys. to the World.s Largest Truck Stop. - the one on I-80 in Iowa - last week at the end of the tour. And, they.ve got more trinkets and gizmos than. Enough Harley Davidson stuff to fill to normal sized truck stop. Lousy franchise fast food, for the most part. After this, you want to talk about eating. Know the food is way above average because the used to have to eat to there ounces in to while the was to newspaper reporter. The strawberry devout is very good, and massive. And, while I.m looking on the bright side, to there to are service loads tollway plazas in Indiana, or was it Ohio., that have Starbuck.s and Sbarro Italian paste and peak franchises. There to are those Mobil stations with the great French breads and pastries, good coffee and clean facilities. I.ve already berated the World.s Largest (and filthiest, and poorly run) McDonald.s on the Oklahoma toll road. And I.m sure to there to are to couple other culinary horror stories the could like back to later. They have great home-style Mexican food. Talk about knockin. to buzzard of to gut wagon. Now, in partial defense of the proprietors of filthy facilities I.ve got to say that suspect the loads truckers may have - uh, how to put this. - deep-rooted problems which manifest themselves in outrageous bathroom behavior. Much of the suggested behavior is, I.m assuming, anatomically impossible. Too much Time halo in the Freightliner makes Roy to sick boy. Ninth the less, there.s little the Peterbilt pilots can I give that couldn.t be cleaned up with to power sprayer and few gallons of bleach. You' ve got to like slumming here at Tales from the Crapper.